My version of Weiner’s press conference
You know how sometimes the best way to stop doing something that is bad for you is to talk about it publically? I’m giving it a try. You guys, I’ve been watching The Bachelorette. Again. I promised myself I wouldn’t tune in for another season after the one with the brunette model who was so boring that I can’t remember anything about her except that she had shiny hair. But I’ve relapsed. I actually asked Justin to DVR it while I was at work! And he did! And then I went on Hulu to catch up on the episodes I missed at the beginning of the season. These are two-hour episodes. This is an enormous time suck. I should not be so invested in finding out whether Ashley finds love. And whom she finds it with. I like to excuse my behavior by saying she’s smart and funny. She’s going to be a dentist! She only cried a little when the guys made fun of her for having small boobs! But then she says stuff like, “I’m still waiting for my happy ending. I thought it would be him,” and I know she’s not really either of these things. So why is it that when I see her curled up in bed turning away from the camera so we won’t see her tears, I truly feel bad for her? I want her to have her happy ending! And if that’s a guy bearing a diamond that she has to give back only if the engagement lasts less than two months, per the ABC contract, so be it. Too sappy? Okay, maybe I just want to see her date 25 guys at the same time while drinking what is surely too much champagne and get away with it. Because I can’t do that. I have a job. And I have to keep my evenings free for watching The Bachelorette.
