Why I Am More Awesome Than Pippa Middleton
I run a lot – and have for about nine years – but I’d never entered an actual race before last weekend. This is because until then no one offered to pay me to do it. But when I got a magazine assignment to cover Tough Mudder, the 10-mile obstacle challenge that involves getting sweatier and dirtier than I’m usually comfortable being, they said they wanted it to be participatory. This is editorspeak for, Would you please make yourself look stupid and then we’ll put you in the magazine? I said Ok, and dragged Julien and Hoa into it with me. Julien is basically down with anything that involves sweat and dirt (and tank tops), and Hoa did it because he is a very good friend. So we put on some fake Chanel tattoos and went for it.
We crawled on our bellies inches below barbed wire, swam through a dumpster filled with ice cubes, and got shocked with 10,000 volts of electricity — and it was a surprisingly good time. I’m going to make you guys read my story when it comes out at the end of the month for the full report, but, for now, I would just like to point out that Pippa Middleton ran a race recently and a) she wore pink, which Julien refused to allow me to do and b) she didn’t even get dirty.
Which leads me to conclude that, even though she is someone I would really like to have standing lunch dates with, I am so much more of a badass than she is. See?
