On Christmas Eve, I was helping my mom improve her Gchat skills—I wish I could say this was a tradition—when I spilled a glass of red wine on my year-old laptop. My dad had asked my mom if it was okay to give me a crystal goblet for my wine, which is a joke dads make, but in my case it’s not a rhetorical question. The computer did some things that made it seem like Gremlins were inside it, until I realized I should turn it off. After that, according to helpful people on the Internet who had also doused their laptops with liquids, I needed to let it dry out for 48 hours. This was a good idea since, like many a Betty Ford entrant, it smelled like Cabernet Sauvignon. But after the waiting period, it still stunk and wouldn’t turn on. The Apple store said they’d fix it for about half the original price—ouch—and I have my blogging machine back now, minus everything I ever saved on it. That feels alternately awful and okay. I devoted a lot of time to writing that no one will ever read, even if it’s just me for the thousandth time, but I also have a blank computer for 2012. In an extra bit of awesomeness, my parents, who are way too nice, offered to pay for half of the repair. I’m sure they wish I would have just broken the goblet.
I either resoluted to cook more or eat more cheese. I forget.
My last meal in San Francisco: Chicken wings under a pile of red chilies.
Happy 2012! I’m probably going to smile like this all year long.
It is important to stay hydrated on New Year’s Eve.
I picked this magnum of red right off of the vine in Napa.
While riding the subway in Tokyo, I saw this sign — and Japanese girl re-glue on her false eyelashes.
I’m not sure if this picture was taken before or after I drank a bottle of sake from 7-11.
There is a lot about this picture you can’t discern by looking at it.

Matthew and I got up at 4 AM to go to the daily Tokyo fish market auction, which, according to our guidebook, was supposed to be the best tourist attraction in the city. We thought about sleeping in until 4:30, but as you can see in the picture, that was not necessary: I’m well rested and wide awake. After making our way through the market to the back where the fish auction was being held — which involved dodging Japanese dudes flinging around 200-pound tuna fish — we were immediately kicked out. It turns out tourists are not allowed. So we decided it was time for a sushi breakfast. At 6 AM. As you can see, there’s a line and I’m not the first person in it. This isn’t because the restaurant hasn’t opened yet; it’s because it’s already filled. However, I’m not last in line either. About 50 people are standing behind me, which, as you can also see, I find delightful.

I’d never had omakase sushi before because in New York it costs like $400, but here it was only about $50 (after subtracting the flight to Japan, of course) so we decided to do it. I made Matthew document the entire 14-piece affair, plus a couple of rolls, bean cake, and miso soup, a sample of which I posted below.



Then we went back to the hotel to take a nap.
When I go to Asia, I like to get eyelash extensions. If you like to get different souvenirs, I’m not going to criticize you. I decided to do this my last morning in Tokyo because I didn’t want to waste Matthew’s time with my need for quality, affordable fake lashes. He was leaving early in the morning and my flight wasn’t until four. But the night before when I asked the concierge where I should go, she was very concerned that I wouldn’t have enough time to get them done before my flight. And because this was Japan, where the customer service is on the level of having a personal assistant, she reiterated this warning in a memo slipped under our hotel room door later that night. It turned out to be an even better souvenir than fake eyelashes.
To: Ms. Collins-Gibson
From: bell Yagasaki
Date: 2011/10/27
Subject:
Thank you for staying with us at Hilton Tokyo.
I tried to look for eyelash extension salon, However almost salon will open 11:00a.m., and they need about 1 hour half to do it.
So, if you do it tomorrow before taking the bus to the airport, I think that you will be busy.
And, I have a question for you.
Will you take the bus to the airport from our hotel?
If you do, you need to make a reservation in advance.
Thank you, and best regard.
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Sandwich Artist
vh1:
Well, my day is RUINED. :(
TRUE LOVE IS A MYTH.
God bless America.
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